Van der Kolk 在书里提出了一个叫"容纳之窗"（window of tolerance）的概念——每个人都有一个情绪可以被处理的区间，超出这个区间，人就会失控，或者关机。
"As long as people are within their window of tolerance, they can function reasonably well. But when they're outside it — either in a state of hyperarousal or hypoarousal — they lose their capacity to think rationally."
"Traumatized people chronically feel unsafe inside their bodies: The past is alive in the form of gnawing interior discomfort."
所谓"情绪管理"，其实很大程度上是扩宽这个窗口——而不是强迫自己压缩感受，假装什么都没发生。